News / Life / Clark County Life

Gardening With Allen: Remember loved ones with plants

By Allen Wilson for The Columbian

Published: August 5, 2023, 6:02am

I lost my oldest son last week. He had been gradually deteriorating with multiple sclerosis for over 20 years. In spite of his condition, he had been living a full life around his seven children and 11 grandchildren. I attended a memorial service in Utah where he was visiting two of his children. All of his children and many others shared their happy memories with him. He loved his children fiercely and they adored him.

My wife suggested that I use this occasion to write about trees and other plants of remembrance. This will be especially important for my son since he chose to be cremated without a grave site.

There is a plan to plant a flowering cherry tree at his home in Virginia. I suspect there will be remembrance trees planted in Texas, California, Colorado, Utah and Oregon where his children reside. I will plant one here where I live now.

When my mother died she chose to be cremated without a grave site. Although I was shown the beautiful location where her ashes were scattered by my brother in Colorado, I wanted something closer. So I dedicated a fruiting cherry tree to her, which I planted in my backyard. I even buried some memorabilia at the base.

I was first introduced to remembrance trees when a friend took me to the house where he lived when he was born. He showed me a large maple shade tree.

“That is my tree,” he told me. “My parents planted it when I was born. I was even allowed to carve my initials in the trunk. There, you can still see them.”

There was also a little metal plaque with his name and birthdate.

Then he showed me three other trees, each planted when his brother and sisters were born. There was also a remembrance plant for his grandmother when she died. She always loved lilacs, so her plant was a lilac.

You can choose any kind of tree or other plant for remembrance. Most of the remembrance trees I have planted have been flowering trees. My children were born in three different locations, but I did not own a home when the first three were born. So their remembrance trees are all at one location.

Burying memorabilia at the base of trees is an option I have used only twice. I think it would be especially appropriate for the passing of young children. It’s probably best to place the memorabilia inside a box and mark it some way on top of the ground.

Would a remembrance tree be appropriate for your family or business? It is always a good idea to plant trees. Trees are one of the main ways carbon dioxide is removed from the air. And carbon dioxide is the main greenhouse gas causing global warming.

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