For Mother’s Day, Columbian readers share words of wisdom from mom

When The Columbian asked readers to share favorite advice from their moms, Debby Gage thought of all she learned from her mother.

Gage, 71, is now retired, but every day she was on the job as a Battle Ground High School home economics teacher, she conveyed lessons she learned from her mother about frugality and making-do.

“Mom didn’t sit me down and say, ‘Deb, this is what you do,’ ” Gage recalled. “She taught by example.”

Even if her mother’s advice couldn’t be summed up in a sentence, it still guides Gage today as she throws together a meal from economical ingredients in her cupboard.

Other readers still have their mothers’ words ringing in their ears. Here’s an array of that motherly wisdom.

My mom used to say to me, “When you work, you work with both hands — not with one hand.” I said this to my 7-year-old son recently as he navigated his Nintendo Switch while attempting to do his chores at the same time.

— Patricia Esteb, Vancouver

“Stick to your word, because it says everything about you.”

— Kari Norman, Vancouver

My mother taught me from my first babysitting job to pay myself first by saving 10 percent, and then spend the other 90 percent only on things that were really important to me. That advice has served me well in my life because at an early age I learned to live on less than what I made.

— CarolLee Braithwait, Vancouver

“The Lord helps those who help themselves.”

— Martha B. Wiley, Vancouver

Two pieces of advice from my mom have stuck with me through my life:

One, make your bed as soon as you get up every day and your bedroom will look perfectly clean and orderly.

And, two, never trust the turn signals of other drivers on the road — drive defensively.

I make my bed every day and she was right. I confess, though, that I almost always believe the turn signals of other drivers except at tricky intersections. I’m sure she’s right about that one, too.

— Nancy Schultz, Vancouver

In the ’50s, my single-parent mom raised two children while working six days a week from 9 to 5. She modeled a principle of “ask questions and learn from others.” I often watched her poke that curious head under the hood alongside the gas station attendant, inquiring about this and that as he checked the oil.

I learned to keep a healthy weight from her, too: “Always have a container of ready-to-eat veggies or fruit available — and brush your teeth right after a meal to limit snacking.”

On parenting: “Let your kids take some risks; just teach ’em to check it out first on how to do things safely.” 

When I’d worry about an error, she’d quip, “That’s OK, I made a mistake once, too!” 

My experience is, “You hold a mother’s hand for a little while, but you hold her heart forever.”

— Kay Hudziak, Brush Prairie

In order to avoid food-borne illness, my mother’s mantra was, “When in doubt, throw it out.” There were related rules, of course, pertaining to refrigeration, thorough cooking, and how to purchase food in the first place. However, at the core was that simple mantra.

— Helen Sullivan, Vancouver

Whenever I couldn’t find something, my mother would say, “It’s where you left it.” Another thing my mother said: “Always iron the collar and the sleeves first.”  

— Alice Winczer, Vancouver

The advice I received at the age of 4 from my mother that has endured, and I believe is responsible for much of the success I have had in the ensuing 51 years, is the value of handwritten short notes.

When I was old enough to take one of those red, thick pencils in hand to that very wide-ruled beige newsprint, it was expected that I would write a three sentence thank-you note to the kind relative or family friend that was gracious enough to send me a birthday or holiday gift. This gave me much-needed printing practice, and it increased the odds of me continuing to receive those highly coveted cards with the 10 little dimes in the slits that I loved so much. This was in the “olden days” of the late ’60, mind you, so bear with me! I continued this practice throughout my childhood when I received gifts, invites to social events, and just to keep in touch with my snowbird grandparents, Mimaw and Pipaw, in Florida from the frozen tundra of Minnesota where I grew up.

When I was 14, I went on my first job interview to be a dishwasher at a new restaurant that was to open in our town. I nervously met with the manager, learned about the duties of the job, shook his hand when I left, and promptly went home and wrote a thank-you note for the interview to him that I dropped in the mailbox that same day. Two days later, I received a call from him. He offered me that much-needed job. And he told me that, though there had been over 50 applications, I was the only one to write a note. I worked there for five years, ending as a waitress. The job paid for my first year in college. 

I have continued the practice of writing four to five short notes a week to this day, 51 years later. The recipients vary from folks I know who may need a little day brightener, to a grocery store cashier who had a genuine smile for me, to the caregivers who gave dear mother comfort, love and laughter at the end of her days with us. The enduring gift of the “short note” in no way compares the enduring gift of a mother’s advice lovingly given.

— KJ Naumann, Ridgefield

“The days cannot tell what the years can.” My mother is now 90 years old, and her advice holds true, especially today.

— Karen Wright, Vancouver

My mother was, and at age 94 is still, full of motherly wisdom and advice.

One of my favorites was that chocolate was a vitamin.

When I was growing up, Mom kept a large Hershey bar in the refrigerator, that no one else could touch. It was her VITAMIN! Since Mother said so, it must be true. I still believe that chocolate is a necessary vitamin that I need to take daily. I buy the dark chocolate variety at See’s.

— Debbie Evans, Ridgefield

My mom told us that if we made our bed every morning, our bedroom wouldn’t look so messy and it would be a more calming environment. I’m in my 60s and have never not made my bed every single morning and she was right. I just wish my kids would have taken that advice to heart.

She taught me much bigger lessons, as well. My mother was widowed at the age of 30 with five children ages 10 and under. She returned to school and eventually earned her teaching degree while working full time. Amazingly, she always had a hot meal for us. She sewed beautiful clothes for her four daughters, including my wedding dress. She never remarried and still lives very independently at age 85 on 12 acres in Central Washington.

Her greatest advice to me: “Always live within your means. Don’t buy things you don’t need and can’t afford.”

Although my frugality sometimes drove my husband crazy, he has come to appreciate what that has allowed us to accomplish. I am free to enjoy life’s adventures but still appreciate a really good deal.

— Sylvia Sandoval Hall, Vancouver