Jeanne Stewart's first big decision as commissioner.Photo Gallery
It had all the makings of great political theater. A no-holds-barred WWF cage match.
And it was being held on the sixth floor of the county administration building Tuesday. Why, it was a fight of good versus evil surrounding the new charter, which is about to take effect.
Everyone wanted a seat.
• In one corner is Commissioner Tom Mielke. Mielke is a befuddling man. He’s been in politics for what seems like an eternity, which proves that voters have a large tent. A very large tent. Mielke can never seem to grasp even the most simple concepts. He is a train wreck that isn’t waiting to happen. It has happened. But — for some reason — he always walks away unscathed.
• In the other corner is Commissioner David Madore. Madore is a very bright — dare I say crafty — man who carefully calculates everything he does. But he often has blinders on, causing him to miss the painfully obvious. This results in him doing more stupid stuff than most could imagine. We shake our heads. He smiles.
Despite the M&M boys being very different people, they almost always end up on the same page. They’re both conservatives. They’re both Republicans. And they both believe in less government unless — unless — that less government means one of their cronies might find themselves out of a job.
I’ll get to that later, because I first have to introduce another actor in the ring. And she would either be savior of all that is good in this world or — or — side with Mielke.
Enter (dramatic pause required here) Commissioner Jeanne Stewart. Stewart has been in the political arena for some time. Her latest gig was that as a Vancouver city councilor. She was bounced out of the liberal bastion in the last city election by a bright, hard-charging woman.
Hey, it happens.
But long political careers die hard. So when a county commissioner seat opened up, she entered stage left and won it.
Her campaign rested largely on the concept that she would be an independent voice. There was some concern that adding her as a third Republican to the board would simply result in her falling in line with Madore and Mielke. That wouldn’t be good, because the M&M boys have been bad.
But on this day — the day of a proposed ordinance that would weaken the charter — she would have little choice because the boys were divided. Stewart would decide.
o o o
I had written a column — an open letter — to Stewart a few days before this Tuesday meeting, urging her to reject the ordinance that had been proposed by Mielke.
Mielke’s ordinance would prevent the county manager from merging county departments. The newly passed charter will give the county manager that power, but Mielke wanted to take it away from him.
But why would a conservative Republican who touts less government want to prevent someone from cutting government? Merging departments could save taxpayers close to $1 million.
o o o
Enter Don Benton. Benton is another conservative Republican. He has somehow been elected state senator over and over again. The last time he won by fewer than 100 votes. I’m guessing folks are finally catching on to his bad act. He’s quite well off thanks to taxpayers. He’s squeezed more free lunches and free trips out of his Senate job than you can imagine. But when you’re Benton, there’s always more money — mostly taxpayers’ money — to be had.
The job of director of the county’s Environmental Services Department opened up, and my devilishly smiling buddy smelled dough. It didn’t matter that he couldn’t tell the difference between burgers and biomass. That $100,000-a-year environmental job was calling him.
And before you could say baddabing, baddaboom, Benton was given the job by the M&M boys. No real interview. No posting of the job opening. It was just given to him. That had immediate consequences. Taxpayers had to cough up $250,000 to settle a claim from someone who actually was qualified for the job but never had a chance to apply. Oh, the M&M boys should have canned Benton right then, but that’s not the way back-room deals work.
Pay the complainant off. Surely, they thought, this will all be tomorrow’s news soon enough.
But it wasn’t. The Columbian’s regular coverage of the M&M boys, our editorials and columns kept their bad behavior alive. The public stayed on it, as well, and eventually the charter was passed based in large part on what was just described. And because that charter would allow the county manager to merge departments, that means the manager could merge Benton’s department with another department and — baddabing, baddaboom — Benton would be gone.
Mielke wanted no part of seeing Benton go. He denies it, of course, but would you expect him to admit it? Thus his proposed ordinance. But Madore — my crafty friend Madore — recognized the beauty in merging departments. He finally realized that Benton was killing him politically, and now would love to see him go.
o o o
The showdown was about to begin. Me? I was hoping to get a front row seat to watch this play out. I’d bring along my Don’t Do Stupid Stuff mug just to remind the decision-makers on what to do. Here we go!
(Coming Sunday: The great political theater plays out.)
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